Women Putting Family First

Feminist Fallacy challenges the idea that every woman must be a feminist. We also want to encourage women to explore their femininity and the benefits of women investing their lives in the home, marriage and family. Today we profile four women who chose to identify as wives and mothers, rather than as feminists.

Nina is 31 years old and is more confident and motivated than ever. She married at age 26, is a homemaker and loves the strong bond she is creating with her children by being with them all the time. She characterizes her marriage as happy, because of the teamwork. She has good communication with her husband, which makes her marriage stronger. Being home, she also has the freedom to do what she loves. Besides being a mom, she is passionate about fashion. She makes money by selling second-hand clothes, and is currently working on starting her own brand. Her husband praises her all the time, calling her his right hand. On a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being the best), she rates her marriage a 10.

Her advice to other women who want to follow her path is “don’t let nobody discourage you or make you feel bad for deciding to put your family first.”

Maryanne is a 33-year-old in a second marriage. She met her husband on the Tinder app. She describes him as a kind, caring, honest loving, encouraging and supportive man. She feels fortunate to be home with her babies, homeschooling them and taking care of her husband. “I’ve definitely matured, and become more compassionate, understanding, and patient,” she explains. “I’ve gained substantial skills, including: cooking, cleaning, time management, organization, budgeting, etc.” Misty’s husband works long hours, 5.5 days a week. She assists him in his rigorous schedule by making sure his clothes are clean and laid out. She makes him breakfast and lunch and dinner. She warms up his socks and jacket on cold days. She helps him take off his shoes after a long day. He appreciates her actions and thanks her all the time. If she is not feeling well, he will cook dinner, do the dishes and occupy the kids while she naps. Misty rates her marital happiness, “definitely a 10 😊.”

Annie, 33, met her husband when they were in high school. They were best buddies, yet, didn’t start dating until her senior year of college. Annie comes from a liberal Jewish home. She was kicked out in high school, told to live with her mother, only her mom told Annie she was unwelcome. She was raped at the age of 17 and went down some dark roads, depression, self-harm, sex, drugs, rock and roll. At one point she considered herself a feminist and was determined not to get married or have children. Thanks to her very devout husband, she found a heavenly Father who loves her and this changed everything. Her husband started his own business, and she considers herself “a 1950’s housewife, and proud of it.” Because her husband works remotely, they live in a recreational vehicle and travel around for most of the year. Annie schools their 3 children at home. “I am living a life that everyone dreams of. Traveling around the country, exploring new places, and giving my kids real life experiences seems like a big reward of choosing to stay home.” She says on a scale of 1 to 10 her marriage is an 11 or 12. She and her husband are together most of the time, living in a 450 square feet home with 3 kids. They have fun together and laugh a lot.

Kathy married late in life, and decided to leave the workforce to support her husband who was building a growing business. A year into their marriage, she found out she was unable to have children. She finds life half as hard with a partner, and devotes herself to cooking, entertaining, laundry and trying to make a peaceful and safe harbor for her husband to return to. She handles all the home improvements, managing their rental properties, and works part time as a freelancer, from home. “Staying home, even though we don’t have children, is still important. It frees my husband to devote the time and attention his business requires.” Her husband works seven days a week, which gives her time to visit with friends and her elderly parents. She rates her marital happiness as a 10.

These four women have several things in common. Each is devoted to serving their husband and taking the various burdens of home on as their ‘job.’ They each have a positive attitude about being home and available to the other members of their household. The three who have children really enjoy spending time with and nurturing their young. We applaud these women for their accomplishments on the home front.

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